2013 Season of Gratitude Final List

Blog post #401 of 365

Gratitude day 46
I am grateful for reason. The ability to think things through and figure out a solution to almost any situation. Someone recently told me reason is simply common sense but I don't agree. Common sense to me doesn't require much thought if any but reason requires systematic thought.
I am thankful for reason.

I believe people take thought and the thought process for granted until something bad happens. I am very appreciative of a good mind that works relatively well.

Gratitude day 47
I am grateful for music. Today I have songs running through my head. I love that it isn't the same song but even that doesn't bother me if it is a good one. This season we get to listen to songs we either avoid the rest of the year or don't think about. Some are so beautiful and some I know why we avoid but today I have all kinds going both old and new and I appreciate both.
I am thankful for music.

I love music. Including seasonal music and even jingles. Some of those old Barry Manilow jingles "I am stuck on Bandaid cause Bandaid stuck on me!" Or "You deserve a break today so get up and get away to McDonald's." They stick in your head!

Gratitude day 48
I am grateful for stamps. The kind you put on an envelope and send in the mail. I love real cards and letters. I enjoy computer letters, notes, PM's, emails and e-cards but there is something special about holding them while you open and read them. My favorite are the ones for no apparent reason but during the Christmas season and birthdays I see more. You just can't get those without a stamp.
I am thankful for stamps.

I sent my cards out exactly one week before Christmas. Slacker to be sure but the ones I sent out were important. They were for people who should hold a card from me...

Gratitude day 49
I am grateful for text messages. I would much rather hear your voice but those quick little I'm think of you moments or those cool photos meant just for me right this minute texts are so appreciated.
I am thankful for text messages!

No really if you love me you'll call.

Gratitude day 50
I am grateful for family time. Spending the day with family is pretty spectacular. Especially when you don't see them often enough.
I am thankful for family time.

Family Christmas party!!! Can't beat that.

Gratitude day 51
I am grateful for all of the opportunities I've had in my lifetime to date and all of the ones to come. There are many. I am thankful I can recognize them as opportunities. If you aren't paying attention or aren't a good sport you'll miss a lot. I mean boat loads. But they are there for the having. Some you need to plan for, some you need to save for, some you just have to grab hold. All of them totally worth the effort.
I am thankful for all of the opportunities I've had in my lifetime to date and all of the ones to come.

Sometimes opportunities are hard to see but the key is too keep your eyes open. Also understand that sometimes disappointments are also opportunities dressed down to throw you off. pay attention and be grateful.

Gratitude day 52
I am grateful for memories. I have had the opportunity to make many and recently while going through old photos so many came rushing in filling my soul with gratitude for all I have. I look forward to making more memories with family and friends. I appreciate everyone even the not so great ones because they helped mold who I am.
I am thankful for memories.

I've made many and they are all worth it. Even the bads ones taught me a bunch!

Gratitude day 53
I am grateful for puzzles of every kind. I love every kind of puzzle. They are a challenge to figure out. Crosswords and Sudoku books are an easy was to pass the time in a waiting room or while in line and the DMV. Every year my mom and dad got a puzzle for Christmas or their anniversary (at Christmas time) and would put it together on New Year's eve. It is a really good memory. Some of those puzzles were beautiful and some were intentionally difficult but always fun for them. I have always loved putting puzzles together. This year at the family Christmas party Cody, Heather, and Ronin gave me a puzzle of the three of them. It sits under the tree waiting for my Christmas paintings to be finished but soon I'll be putting together my favorite puzzle yet!
I am thankful for puzzles of every kind.

The puzzle from the kids really is fun. But I like to figure things out and put things together so it stands to reason I'd enjoy puzzles.

Gratitude day 54
I am grateful for the spirit of Christmas. Christmas is a time of remembering the birth and life of Christ but it goes beyond that. Your religion or lack of religion is not as important as the spirit of Christmas. Christmas is a time of sharing, giving, and gratitude. It is a time of family and friends. Enjoy your celebrations and love each other as Christmas approaches because that it what the spirit of Christmas is all about.
I am thankful for the spirit of Christmas.

People forget it isn't about them.

Gratitude day 55
I am grateful for presents. It is Christmas and I admit it, I like gifts. Anyone who says otherwise is not grateful. I love to give gifts too. I like opening presents and yes sometimes I will take my time because I want to savor the moment. I especially love well thought out gifts and gifts made with love. Those are my very favorite. I hope you all were very good this year and got really great presents.
I am thankful for presents.

I got some really good ones this year.

Gratitude day 56
I am grateful for bittersweet moments. You know the kind of moments that pull on all of the emotions. Like talking to my daughter in OK. Great to hear her voice but brings tears because she is so far away. Or when I watched the Jib Jab video of my friend's children. Seeing her son stand and dance for the first time. Okay yes, I know our Jonny wasn't actually standing and dancing but it moved me. Smiling at the sweet dancers and tears falling as I know I will not likely see him dance or stand in this lifetime. He has Angelman's Syndrome, you can look it up.
I am thankful for bittersweet moments.

Jonny's mom is an Angel advocate and supports so many Angel parents. She astounds me with her ability to see beyond the disability and to show others the teacher Jonny and his angel friends really are.

Gratitude day 57
I am grateful  for sleep. I know it sounds ordinary but it is necessary.
I am thankful for sleep.

Insomnia and pain make sleep difficult for me.

Gratitude day 58
I am grateful for water. I love water. The ocean, lakes, streams, rivers, canals, aqueducts, rain and snow are all beautiful and powerful. When you think about it water is in every part of life, unavoidable if you will. Why would you want to? Okay maybe a tsunami or flood maybe but even a flood can be fun if you live on high ground. Water, I love to look at it, swim in it, drink it, wash with it, and bathe in it.
I am thankful for water.

Really I love it.

Gratitude day 59
I am grateful for kept promises. I try not to make them unless I can follow through and appreciate those who do the same. There was a time when your 'word' was enough. Not so much anymore but it is a wonderful thing when trust is enough.
I am thankful for kept promises.

May your word always be enough and my you follow through.

Gratitude day 60
I am grateful for sunshine. I can't paint without it. (Important this time of year.) It lifts the mood in winter. Sunshine is a good thing but like all good things too much can burn everything. Especially us very light skinned folk and delicate plants. But just enough keeps us warm and makes everything grow.
I am thankful for sunshine.

It is cool outside but sunny and warm when it shines on you. Beautiful California end of December day.

Gratitude day 61
I am grateful for courage. All courage both mine and the courage I see in others. The kind of courage that requires one to go to great lengths or the kind that requires one great effort to get through the day of 'small' hurdles and every kind in between. I mean really folks, there are people who choose to face death in their professions to protect others and there are those who face pain or worse every single day. In addition there are those with the courage to face the unknown. Who stand beside the ones who struggle most, perhaps may struggle far beyond what what we ever see. Whether it be mental, emotional, or physical supporting them in any way they can even if only in prayer. Your courage makes a difference. To everyone who face and persevere through these kinds of challenges with such courage I applaud you. You inspire me and for that you have my gratitude and respect.
I am thankful for courage.

I wrote that last one through tears. Too many people I know are so courageous and strong. Wow.

As I close out this last quarter of gratitude I look forward to the next set. I have heard it said thinking of something to be grateful for is difficult but I can tell you that even at my lowest points and on my worst days I can always find something to be grateful for. In the times of my highest highs and greatest accomplishments I am also so grateful for the opportunity to express my gratitude and to anyone who happens upon this blog either by chance or with vigor, thank you too. Happy new year.

400

Blog post #400 of 365

Yay for 400!

For anyone that just stumbled upon this blog and wonder about the numbering, it has a purpose. I was challenged to write 365 blogs in 365 days and I did but decided to see if it would be too hard to keep doing it. So far not so hard.

Nobody Is Perfect

Blog post #399 of 365

I hope this link stays up and that you can watch this because it moves me every time I see it.

http://www.realfarmacy.com/because-who-is-perfect/

I grew up with a disabled uncle who was put in a home after my grandmother passed away. He was an adult by then . When I would go see he he was always grateful. I took my grandfather to see him and he always lit up at his arrival no matter how much time passed. My uncle was unable to take care of himself. He spoke only a few words and eventually lost those. That experience helped me to accept everyone for who they are and to know looks are superficial.

Later when I was going to school I volunteered in my community with developmentally delayed adults. I brought my kids. They learned everyone has something to give. I hope one day their kids will understand as well.

The folks in this video only appeared to have physical malformation. It was a bit sad when she said it was hard to look in the mirror. How much of that identity did the outside world place there with its artificial perfection depicted in TV, movies and print? It really makes me think we could do so much better because nobody is perfect.

Time

Blog post #398 of 365

I wish I had more.

I am trying to be more productive, to use my time more wisely. That isn't what I mean. I mean I wish I could have more time with people I love. Life is too dang short.

I wish there were more hours in a day and night. It seems like 24 is just not enough.

Wishes for Next Year

Blog post #397 of 365

Next year I want to have Christmas with all of my children. That and good health for all of my friends and family is all I really wish for next Christmas.

Bonus Christmas Wishes

Blog post #396 of 365

I must have gotten 20 or 30 texts from people I don't know on Christmas day all wishing me a Merry Christmas. They apparently originated from people sending mass Christmas texts then those folks replying. It made for a weird day because some of those 'unknown callers turned out to be friends who had changed their numbers, sigh. I just hope everyone who should have got merry Christmas wishes from me and to those strangers who got Christmas wishes consider it a bonus, I did.

Our Tiny Ballerina

Blog post #395 of 365

Sparkling shoes.

 Sparkling bow and tutu

 Flowers and candy.

Our tiny ballerina.

Missed Grandkids

Blog post #394 of 365

At the Christmas party I missed a few of my grandkids who never made it and for two weeks will be in Mexico...

They are loved.

Visiting My Grandson

Blog post #393 of 365

A week ago I got to visit my adorable grandson and his wonderful parents.

I am a lucky Grandma!

Oh and Merry Christmas from Santa and I!

Children's Christmas Pagaent

Blog post #392 of 365

Last week I went to a Christmas pageant my grandson was in.

It was fun and the kids did a great job even if they got a little wiggly up there and faced the back sometimes.














This is my little lamb. (Middle kid with the vest.)

This is him afterward with his cousin the angel. No really she played an angel.

I loved  watching them and I think they had fun too.

Enough Already With the Public Arguing

Blog post #391 of 365

The headlines have stirred up debates about gay and straight people and their 'rights' to act or have opinions. You and I all have a right to do what we want (as long as we are not hurting ourselves or others) and the right to our own opinion. But I have had enough of the public gay straight debates already. I don't care to fight about it.

The Bible can be read by a thousand different people and none will completely agree on everything. It just isn't possible.

I have gay and straight friends. I do, and I love them all the same. I don't care who you choose to be in a relationship with as long as you really love and respect them.

Who you love has nothing to do with religion. It isn't really ever up for public debate so back the heck off of each other. Just appreciate the people in your life and get on with it but PLEASE leave your hate and anger to yourselves. Yes, I am talking to straight and gay people too.

Really public debate is arguing. Why argue? Lets all just agree to disagree. I mean really who will that hurt. but keep your mouth shut because not doing it hurts people. It can kill people. Yes I said it can kill people.

Gay teens are attempting suicide at alarming rates. Like one in three. People both young and old are killing themselves because they feel rejected or less than human for the way they feel. What a senseless way to leave this world. All of the public arguments are pushing people to say and do really awful things so enough already.

Is it possible that we can quit trying to be so theologically correct? Yes please. Is it morally wrong to quit right fighting? I believe it is a perfect solution. I've read my Bible and I have my own opinions about it. Mut they are my opinions not yours. Frankly my church has an interesting view on the gay straight argument. They say don't argue, love and accept everyone. Hello, isn't that how we should all be?

SO I am going public here and saying I don't care how you feel about the issue.

Family Christmas Party

Blog post #390 of 365

We had a our annual Christmas party this year with my brother. Here are some highlights!

 There was lots of rides in the old '30.

Lots of hugs.

People we don't see often.

Some beard imitaions.

 Lots of play.

Loads of cousins young and old.

All hosted by these two!

I love these gatherings!

More Cookies For Santa

Blog post #398 of 365

More cookies for Santa or for my neighbors or for me. These are good. I've made them before and they are delicious!

Everything but the kitchen sink cookies!

What you'll need:
1 cup white sugar
1 cup brown sugar
1 cup (room temp) nut butter (not what you think, I'm allergic to peanuts so I use almond or sunflower but you can use what you like)
1/2 butter (room temp)
3 eggs
4 1/2 cups rolled oats
2 teaspoons baking soda
1/2 cup coconut flakes
1/2 cup chocolate chips (You can use white chocolate, carob or M&Ms if you like)
1/2 cup chopped pretzels
1/2 cup cranberries (original recipe calls for raisins but I don't like raisins but you can use what you like)
1/2 chopped nuts of choice (I use raw almonds and raw cashews)

What you'll do:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees
Cover cookie sheet with parchment paper
Cream together butter, nut butter, and sugars in a large bowl
Add eggs one at a time until mixed well
Stir in oats and baking soda
Stir in coconut flakes, chocolate, pretzels, fruit, and nuts until well combined
Drop by rounded tablespoon full on to prepared cookie sheet
Bake 11 to 13 minutes or until set around the edges (If you cook longer it will be a puck and not a cookie.)
Cool 2 minutes on the cookie sheet and then move to cooling rack to cool completely
Store in an airtight container

Note: If you don't like one of the listed goodies change it. Your kitchen your choice! Just remember if you remove something replace the volume with something else.

Cranberry Chocolate Chip Cookies

Blog post #397 of 365

I always wanted to make scratch shortbread cookies. These look yummy and after I finish my Christmas painting I'll make some. I know I should be done but I'm not.

What you'll need:
1 cup butter (room temp)
1/2  cup + 2 tablespoons powdered sugar
1/4 cup cornstarch
1 1/2 cups flour
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon vanilla (don't be cheap, use the good stuff)
1 cup dried cranberries
1/2 cup white chocolate chips

What you'll do:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees
Line a cookie sheet with parchment paper
Cream together sugar and butter then use a mixer until fluffy
Mix in cornstarch, flour, and salt
Add vanilla, cranberries and chocolate chips until well combined
place balls of dough on prepared cookie sheet and press down into a disc shape
Bake for 15-18 minutes until the bottoms are lightly golden brown
Remove from oven
Cool cookies on a cooling rack
Store in an airtight container

Christmas Memories

Blog post #396 of 365

Every Christmas from my birth until my 8th were spent spoiled by an organized yer crazy grandmother who planned and purchased for Christmas all year long. Once I became a parent I tried to do the same thing and plan all year so my kids would never have to feel that void. I did well for the most part.

Christmas eve 26 years ago my baby boy had life saving surgery. Christmas day 26 years ago he met Santa in his hospital room. I am ever grateful for the nurses, staff and that special Mr.Claus. I came so close to losing him. I am grateful every day that I did not.

Christmas eve 27 years ago my first daughter came home from the hospital. She was there for two weeks in the neonatal intensive care unit. She is such a blessing and worth the delay.

Five days before Christmas 19 years ago my husband decided he needed to leave to be happy. My kids and I were penniless and alone. It was a rough Christmas for the six of us. I don't think he ever looked back.

Fifteen days before Christmas 16 years ago I was electrocuted. Totally put a damper on things.

Two weeks before Christmas 3 years ago my baby girl flew off without telling anyone to live with a boy she hadn't seen since she was 5. I haven't seen her since except in photos. She has since split up with the abusive controlling boy and for that I am grateful but she live more than 24 hours drive from me...

Every Christmas since I have struggled this time of year to stay positive. There have been two huge blessings but so much sadness as well. It is such an emotional time of the year for most folks maybe I'm just normal. What keeps me going steady is knowing the season isn't about me.  It is about giving. It is about gratitude. It is about making a difference in the lives of others. It is about love. So I don't dwell. I buck up. You should too!

Chasing Happiness

Blog post #395 of 365

You can't chase happiness. Happiness is faster than you think. Actually happiness is usually found right where you are otherwise it is always out for reach.

I look at people who never appear happy and they have that one thing in common. I'll be happy when or I'll be happy if but that isn't how happiness works.

Happiness is learned and happiness is earned. You can't be happy if you never learned to appreciate where you are and what is around you. Happiness is also earned. It is a gift you give yourself when you have given enough away. If you never endeavor to bring happiness to others have you actually earned the right to find your own?

Just something I was thinking about in this season of giving where some appear only to want more without giving a single thing. Not the monetary stuff so much as the giving of one's self and time.

May you all recognize the happiness around you.

Christmas Nuts

Blog post #394 of 365

Christmas can make people a little bit nutty. Just an observation.

The shopping centers are packed the streets seem so much more crowded this time of year. Where are these folks the rest of the year.

Drivers seem way more impatient and less observant of those around them. Case in point the guy obviously looking for an address while blocking the driveway at the same time my niece was trying to pull out. Look at the bigger picture when you are driving your world extends to mine when you are driving.

People seem more angry, uptight, anxious, nervous, sad, and happy even. I guess the word I'm after is more emotional.

Time speeds up. At least the closer to Christmas the more it seems that way.

Holy cow Christmas makes people a little bit nutty!

2013 Season of Gratitude Part 3

Blog post #393 of 365

Gratitude day 31
I am grateful for peace. Not the lack of fighting kind of peace although lack of fighting is awesome in the most underused kind of way but that quiet calm kind of peace you feel. Like watching the sun set or rise on purpose. The peace you feel when everything comes together. The peace you feel when you watch the power of the ocean. The peace you feel when you watch your child or grandchild peace. Those moments of peace you feel when you know all is right in your world.
I am thankful for peace.

There never seems to be enough of these so when they come I relish them. How could I not?

Gratitude day 32
I am grateful for the time I get to be creative. I picture what I want in my head. Then I wait until I have the proper time to get my creativity out. It can take a while. To be honest it bugs me until I get it out. I'm not sure how much others appreciate the creative side because it can get messy but it sure is fun while it goes on!
I am thankful for the time I get to be creative.

Especially this time of year I am making messes nearly every day. Okay so the messes end up as Christmas gifts but they are gifts made with love by me.

Gratitude day 33
I am grateful for the of sound laughter and giggles. I love humor but the sound alone will bring a smile to any face. Like a smile is a contagious sound of laughter is too. Also laughter reminds me of Mary Poppins - Uncle Albert, "The more I laugh the more I fill with glee!" Good old Walt Disney understood laughter, still does. I get it too. I especially love the laughs that get stuck in your head like a song. You know when something makes you laugh and just thinking about it makes you laugh throughout the day. Those are wonderful days. But the very best laughs are kid laughs. The giggles and belly laughs of a child are just the best!!
I am thankful for the sound of laughter and giggles.

I hear laughter in my memories and in my dreams. I try to make people laugh from time to time and I enjoy when I have succeeded. Oddly I don't try to make people laugh in my blog... I wonder why?

Gratitude day 34
I am grateful for words. All words. The words we hear, the ones we want to hear, the ones that spark imagination, the ones that make us laugh, the ones that make us cry, the ones that expand our vocabulary, the ones that give us hope and the ones that lift us from despair. Words separate and connect us. I love connections best. There are spoken words, written words, words of warning, whispered words, shouted words (those I could use less of), giggled words, words of sorrow, words of praise, words in song and words of love. Words mean we are trying to communicate. I love all kinds of words.
I am thankful for words.

I finished a book today and started the next. I watched a TV show and went to a movie today too. Everywhere I went and everything I did involved words. How can you not appreciate words?

Gratitude day 35
I am grateful for wise words. Notice I didn't say wise people. You see wisdom usually comes in little thoughts deeds and moments. They say wisdom comes with age and to some extent tat is true but I have heard wise words from children to those one inch from the grave. The thing about wise words are no matter who they come from I learn from them. I forever welcome them. And gratefully more is I recognize and appreciate them.
I am thankful for wise words.

I was inspired by the wise words of a young single mom I know. I had to express my gratitude for all wise words no matter who they come from.

Gratitude day 36
I am grateful for sunshine. I live in sunny southern California. The song lies it rains here. In the winter we get snow sometimes too but always in the mountains. I woke up this morning to a beautiful day. I've been spraying clear coat on projects and painting this morning. I enjoyed the sunshine every time I went outside to spray another coat and every time I tried mixing the perfect color. I love the sunshine when I'm working on projects and painting. Well the clouds have come in. I appreciate and love a little cloud cover but not when I'm working on a painting. It distorts the color to use artificial light. So I'll wait patiently for my beloved sunshine to return.
I am thankful for sunshine.

It happens nearly every year. I plan out what I'm going to paint and have to have good sunny not too warm days to accomplish it. Fake like is not so good with painting. It'll do in a pinch but not for the ones I am planning to give as gifts!

Gratitude day 37
I am grateful for live theater. You just can't beat a play. It is that simple.
I am thankful for live theater.

Saw A Christmas Carol today. A play I have seen at many different venues and loved every time.

Gratitude day 38
I am grateful for my grandparents. They have all passed away now but my love and gratitude for them is ever present. They taught me so many wonderful things and supported me in ways nobody but a grandparent could.
I am thankful for my grandparents.

Gratitude day 39
I am grateful for people who can take a hint. There are those who need more but I appreciate those who just need a hint and all is well.
I am thankful for people who can take a hint!

I am not going to get into specifics on this one but I love bright people.

Gratitude day 40
I am grateful for benchmarks. Births, graduations, beginnings, endings, weddings, anniversaries, deaths, birthdays, reunions, and any other thing we use to measure our lives. Okay maybe deaths aren't a favorite part but they bring people together to remember and that is a good thing.
I am thankful for benchmarks.

Happy birthday Morgan!

Gratitude day 41
I am grateful for our Christmas trees. I love looking at Christmas trees. One year when my kids were young we had a tree in almost every room. Every tree decorated differently. We have three small trees this year. I'd venture we have enough decorations for six or seven eight foot trees and two or three miniature trees as well. Each decoration holds a memory, especially for my mom. I've heard it said Christmas trees are branches of memories and for me it is true.
I am thankful for our Christmas trees.

This year I have had the opportunity so see photos of my friends trees from all over the country and I believe this year most everyone has gone all out. Or the ones who have shared photos have. I love looking at them. Seeing the memories and even the obviously professionally decorated ones as well.

Gratitude day 42
I am grateful for comfort. I believe too often we take comfort for granted. We drive cars with a smooth ride. We sleep in beds with pillow tops, memory foam, or air pumps etc. We pull clean clothes from the washer and warm clothes from the dryer. We turn on the faucet and in moments we have warm water to wash our hands and face. We don't have to stoke the flames to heat our food or warm our homes. We have coats, gloves, throws, warm slippers and soft robes. I appreciate all of these things and more for I have at one time or another gone without comforts. I will not take for granted any comforts I enjoy.
I am thankful for comfort.

As I wrote this the morning was cold, the heater was on, my breakfast was warming in the microwave, a load of laundry was in the washer, and I was getting ready to leave for the store in our van. Can I just say I am grateful for all of those comforts. Especially the driving to the store part. Walking with groceries is very difficult indeed!

Gratitude day 43
I am grateful for bacon. Yup, I admit that I enjoy a crisp piece of bacon for breakfast, or in a sandwich or salad. The smoky flavor is just the ticket. I don't have it often but this morning it was perfection!
I am thankful for bacon.

I'd probably eat it more often if it were on sale more often and if my doctor gave me the green light. I will add that I usually eat the turkey bacon. It is more processed but has less fat and calories. Thankfully my son works at a grocery store and buys a bunch when it goes on sale. Thanks son!

Gratitude day 44
I am grateful for Christmas pageants. My grandson was in one today and I can think of nowhere else I'd rather be.
I am thankful for Christmas pageants!

Gosh these little people are adorable. They twitch and fidget but it makes watching that much more entertaining! My grandson is however the most talented one!!! Bonus I get to sit with grandson number one while I watch. And visit with my babies. What a lucky grandma am I.

Gratitude day 45
I am grateful for ballet recitals. My great niece is dancing today and I love to watch her dance. She is a star on her stage.
I am thankful for ballet recitals.

My little Jaden is actually really good. I can tell she knows what she is doing.

Sounds Awful

Blog post #391 of 365

Sounds awful in a bad way not the archaic good way.

Sugar Free Flour Free Brownies

When my friend posted this on her Facebook page I thought barf but she said she is going to make them.

What she says is in it:

1 1/4 cups sugar free chocolate chips or carob
1 15.5 ounce can of black beans rinsed and drained
1/4 cup unsweetened carob or cocoa powder
2 eggs
1/3 cup olive or coconut oil (melted)
1/4 teaspoon cinnamon
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon instant coffee
1 tablespoon powdered Stevia

What she says she did:

Preheat oven to 350 degrees
Line an 8X8 baking dish with parchment paper
Spray parchment with nonstick cooking spray
Combine all ingredients in a food processor until smooth
Pour into prepared baking dish
Bake for 30 to 35 minutes (or until toothpick comes out perfectly clean
Cool on a wire rack for ten minutes before removing from baking dish (lift out, holding the edges of the parchment paper)
Place on a wire rack and cool completely before slicing on a cutting board
Store any uneaten 'brownies' in an airtight container or zipper bag

Note: She said they were pretty chewy and fairly good. She said not everyone in the family liked the carob batch but they all preferred the second batch using coconut oil and cocoa/chocolate. I do not own a food processor so it may be a while before I try these myself.

Christmas For All

Blog post #390 of 365

Recently I have been thinking about political correctness and how wrong it can be.

Several years ago some schools in the Bible belt deemed Halloween a pagan celebration and refuse to allow such celebrations in school. And non-Christians have decided Christmas should not be allowed. Sad but true. It seems like everyone is trying to be heard by stepping on or restricting the beliefs of others.

Well this year I have noticed there is a new trend. Non Christians celebrating Christmas. Some I asked said it is because Christmas has strayed too far from its Christian roots while others said it matters not that is began as a Christian holiday it has become a season of giving.

Oh my goodness. I have always believed Christmas is about giving and gratitude. Yes is Christmas is way too commercialized but I believe at the core giving and gratitude are two of the greatest lessons a human can learn.

I am a Christian. A Mormon to be exact so for me it is nice  to remember the birth of Christ this time of year too. But if you atheists, agnostics, Jewish and other non Christian believers what to celebrate the Christmas season for whatever reason you choose I say more power to ya! And Merry Christmas.

Memory Branches

Blog post #389 of 365

Our Christmas tree is filled with memory branches.

Each ornaments holds a memory.

One year, a few years back I sorted all of my mom's ornaments. She had several boxes of them. Nearly all from Hallmark. She buys one for the grown up children and sometimes for the grown up grandchildren. Nearly always she finds one or more for herself. I love them. I can almost always tell why she picks the ones she does.

As I sorted her ornaments they went into boxes marked by categories. Animals, snowmen, Santas and characters. She had overly full boxes of each. Not to mention a full box of miniature ornaments enough to fully cover two small trees. I have ornaments from my childhood, from my children's childhood and from my mom every year as well. Between the two of us we have ornaments enough to fully cover seven trees and two mini trees. That is a lot of ornaments.

With each ornament comes a memory. Mom purchases ornaments that aren't just pretty or cute but because they remind her or a time, person or place. Mine are equally full of memories. Each one brings a smile!

This year is no different. Every decorated branch is connected to the memory of a person, place or time. Each ornament lovingly placed to connect those memories to the season of gratitude.

As you decorate your tree and place the memories on each branch please try to remember to be grateful for every memory on every limb. And for you who decorate in theme or have your tree decorated by others the same holds true. This time of year we end a year full of memories and get ready to make more.

May your Christmas season be filled with love, happiness and gratitude.

Making the Most of Shared Memories

Blog post #388 of 365

Sixteen years ago yesterday I was electrocuted. The damage lingers still.

As a result I have limited feeling in my right hand and hardly any in my fingers. I have hypersensitivity in my right foot. I am the conductor of unwanted electricity. I shock myself every day just by doing normal stuff. The lips (going in for a kiss) is particularly uncomfortable. I have wicked memory issues. Mostly short term and it bites.

One day I want to reach out and touch something and trust what I feel is real without a shock. It has been many years so I think my neurologist might be right and it is as good as it will ever be but I can hope.

If you read yesterdays post you know it happened on my daughter's birthday. What a way to put a damper on a day that should be celebrated. So about 15.5 years ago I decided that I would celebrate both. I would embrace the difficult first years of my daughter's life and my survival to raise her and her siblings to adulthood.

Yay us!

Mo Mo

Blog post #387 of 365

Today my daughter turns 25. I'm just a little surprised by it. I mean I knew one day well this day was coming but I am ever grateful for every singe day this girl lives and breathes. She was a long awaited daughter #4 of my 5. Her brother couldn't say her name so she became Mo Mo.

Shortly after she was born I noticed her breathing was irregular. Within an hour she was whisked off to a hospital with a neonatal intensive care unit. Her first two years were crucial and I held my breath. The doctors kept close tabs on her as did I.

She was beautiful then and is more beautiful with each passing day. I imagine every mom thinks their kid is handsome or beautiful but by societies standards she is a beautiful girl. Tall, thin, exotic (read Greek), with gorgeous green eyes and dark hair.

She is on her own now. As it should be I guess but in all honesty I worry more about her now than I did in those first few years. She doesn't see herself as the world sees her. Somehow I feel like I have failed as a mom to instill in her the confidence she should have. Lets face it the world loves pretty people. They can have the world at their feet. But she is better in some ways because she works hard at everything she does but still I worry. I guess it is what parents do.

Happy birthday Mo Mo.

Out of Sorts

Blog post #386 of 365

Pain puts me out of sorts. Until today I have actually kept up with the quest to get something done every day for the holidays. I have been a little out of sorts though. Shoulder, neck and back pain for no apparent reason other than because has thrown me off for two days now. Tomorrow even without pain I may not get things done but luckily I have done a bit every day until now.

I have been so out of it I even forgot to publish yesterdays post until today. Wrote it, scheduled it but forgot to publish it.

Pain is a beast I wouldn't wish on anyone!

Nope...

Blog #385 of 365

Nope I've got nothing. It is cold, I'm hurting and tired. So this is it!

Tip Toe If You Must

Blog post #384 of 365

Recently I was reading Facebook when I came across a post from a very young single mom. Okay she is in her twenties and I am more than double her age so yes very young but not a teen mom young. She said something I found very wise in one so young.

"Sometimes the smallest step in the right direction ends up being the biggest step of your life. Tip toe if you must but take the step." Emily T.

It also struck me as brave. I mean it is true the comfort zone is comfortable so moving might take you out of it. Which is very brave indeed.

Taking a step in the beginning of momentum. Newton said, "A body that is at rest stays at rest." But how long can you rest really? I imagine there are some who could but those lazy folk will be there long after you have moved on to greener pastures. Once you start moving it becomes easier and easier to keep moving.

Now how do you know you're headed in the right direction? Trial and error mostly but being informed helps so does looking around as you go. If you find you have lost focus or were never on the right path, then reevaluate and change direction.

You never know when that tiny little step in the right direction will take you over the finish line. Tip toe along my friends, tip toe along.

A Little Goal This Holiday Season

Blog post #383 of 365

It seems like it happens every year. I give gift I make for the holidays. I have made blankets, scarves, clothes, toys, crafts and painted countless paintings. I'm good at it and I enjoy the creative process. I have started in January and June and sometimes the very last minute. It seems that no matter when I start I never get everything done until December. I guess it is like getting ready for school/work/church or whatever and I get prepared but the more prepared I feel I am the more relaxed I am. Relaxed isn't always good for me.

So for the better part of two months I haven't been myself. Sick. Simple as that. Before that Mom was in the hospital and had a surgery. She is well now but it put a chink in the process because we live in a tiny house with no place to spread out and make a big mess that someone doesn't have to walk past. I never knew when she was coming home to I didn't make a totally mess of things. Also a bunch of that time I was getting the house ready for a large family party (mostly done outside since the house is more than tiny.) I probably should have had stuff done but I didn't. I still don't.

This week on Sunday I made a goal to accomplish something every day toward getting Christmas done. So far so good. I actually got more done than I thought I might. The question is what if I have a bad day? I will have bad days. Today was pretty bad but I got something done anyway. Is it good to make a daily goal or would it be better to make the long term goal only? So many questions about this goal. Until I figure it our I'll just keep plugging along.

Making My Mark

Blog post #382 of 365

This morning I was walking through the grass to pick up a mushroom from my neighbor's lawn when I noticed my footprints in the morning dew. It made me think about walking in general. When walking on anything we make a mark. Life is like that. It is near impossible to go through your life without leaking a mark. Even walking on concrete you wear the path a little with each passing.

When I am long gone what will people remember of the marks I left behind? So how will I make my mark mean something?

I have already made marks. I have family and friends who I hope are influenced by me in a meaningful way. At least I hope it is meaningful. I have children and now grandchildren I hope are influenced by me. I make art I hope influences people. I write and I hope in some positive way this influences people.

Several years ago a friend told me my greatest gift is the support I give others. That he was most grateful for that. Since then I have tried in any way I can to be a support to others. To try and understand them and lift them up if I could. Sometimes I can't and I accept that but it won't stop me from trying.

I am reminded of a sign I once saw. It read, Footprints in history aren't made sitting down. So get up and do something. Leave a good footprint.

President George Washington October 3,1789

Blog post #381 of 365

I've thought about this and I really love how everyone seems to have forgotten who our forefathers were. How they were deeply rooted in gratitude and God. I'm not pushing my religion just saying people should remember and quit acting as if God, religion, beliefs, gratitude are important to not just our nation but should be to every nation!

God has many names and many faces to differing people but I'm okay with that. You should be too. And if for some reason you don't believe in God or a higher power or a higher being I'm okay with that. Just please don't try to force your beliefs on me by trying to squelch mine.

President George Washington on Oct. 3, 1789:

Whereas it is the duty of all nations to acknowledge the providence of Almighty God, to obey His will, to be grateful for His benefits, and humbly to implore His protection and favor; and

Whereas both Houses of Congress have, by their joint committee, requested me "to recommend to the people of the United States a day of public thanksgiving and prayer, to be observed by acknowledging with grateful hearts the many and signal favors of Almighty God, especially by affording them an opportunity peaceably to establish a form of government for their safety and happiness":

Now, therefore, I do recommend and assign Thursday, the 26th day of November next, to be devoted by the people of these States to the service of that great and glorious Being who is the Beneficent Author of all the good that was, that is, or that will be; that we may then all unite in rendering unto Him our sincere and humble thanks for His kind care and protection of the people of this country previous to their becoming a nation; for the signal and manifold mercies and the favorable interpositions of His providence in the course and conclusion of the late war; for the great degree of tranquillity, union, and plenty which we have since enjoyed; for the peaceable and rational manner in which we have enabled to establish constitutions of government for our safety and happiness, and particularly the national one now lately instituted; for the civil and religious liberty with which we are blessed, and the means we have of acquiring and diffusing useful knowledge; and, in general, for the great and various favors which He has been pleased to confer upon us.

And also that we may then unite in most humbly offering our prayers and supplications to the great Lord and Ruler of Nations, and beseech Him to pardon our national and other transgressions; to enable us all, whether in public or private stations, to perform our several and relative duties properly and punctually; to render our national government a blessing to all the people by constantly being a government of wise, just, and constitutional laws, discreetly and faithfully executed and obeyed; to protect and guide all sovereigns and nations (especially such as have shown kindness to us), and to bless them with good governments, peace, and concord; to promote the knowledge and practice of true religion and virtue, and the increase of science among them and us; and, generally, to grant unto all mankind such a degree of temporal prosperity as He alone knows to be best.

Given under my hand, at the city of New York, the 3d day of October, AD 1789, —George Washington

Nope I decided to cut and paste this... 

Gratitude From One Little One

Blog post #380 of 365

Jessalynn (almost 3) made a gratitude turkey in preschool the other day. On each feather was written a list of things she is grateful for. Here is the list of things she is grateful for:

Mommy & family.

Beds and going night night.

Toys.

Coloring.

Chocolate milk.

My closet.

Apples.

My clothes (she likes to play dress up.)

Trees.

Juice.

When you are little it is just that simple.

My Fibromyalgia

Blog post #379 of 365

People who don't have it will never understand it. People who do have it don't always have it the same as each other. Some have few symptoms. Some have more.

This is my path. The path I have had as long as I can remember and amplified to an impossible height at puberty. I've probably touched on this before. I just think it is one thing that should be repeated because I have had it forever and most people don't know. Those that do know don't get it. Don't relate to it.

Lots of pain. Nerve pains that flare, pressure point pain, joint pain, muscle pain,and headache pain. I might have missed a few pain. Pain ranges from 'oh that hurts a little' to 'holy hell' make it stop kind of pain.

Inability to sleep.

Exhaustion paired with the inability to sleep. Maybe because of the inability to sleep.

Bouts of gas! Luckily these don't last long. They do make life interesting. Usually these happen in confined spaces like elevators and the grocery isles. NOT on purpose.

The inability to control body temperature and sweating. Sometimes paired sometimes separate. Often helping to interrupt what little sleep I find.

Muscles burning especially in legs and arms. I said burning muscles. Crippling burning muscles.

Muscle twitching and muscle spasms. These annoy but when they strike the eye muscles they are more than annoying. Also large muscle spasms interfere with the ability to sleep!

My skin hurts. So much so that it deserves its own category of pain! I mean pain to the point that clothing hurts kind of skin pain.

Sometimes nausea and rarely TMJ.

Stressing when things are at their worst. Which seems to compound the pain and interfere with sleep.

Anxiety. I'm better with this one.

Did I mention I have apin and sleep issues? Oh you heard, then we're good.

2013 Season of Gratitude Continues Part 2

Blog post #378 of 365

The is the second part of four in my two months of gratitude out loud.

Gratitude day 16
I am grateful for color. I think I appreciate color more because at night I lose the ability to see color. Everything turns to shades of gray unless the object, person or whatever are in direct artificial light. This is something I have always had so I don't often think about unless I'm stopped at a light and see an interesting shade of grade. There are so many shades of gray. But during the day I see and appreciate every color. From the bright yellow of the dandelion, the earthy tans of mushroom, to the vibrant pinks, oranges, & blues of the morning and evening sky. I love how the light plays with color making texture appear where there isn't any and making textures come to life.
I am thankful for color.

There is nothing more beautiful that natures colors. Okay I confess I love unnatural colors like neon and whatnot but why not? The variety of colors in this world are spectacular!

Gratitude day 17
I am grateful for Katy. She usually texts me at the times I need to hear from her most. She has more compassion than most and bolsters mine when I don't feel like I have enough. She is so smart but sometimes doesn't think she is. She is beautiful but sometimes doubts that too. She has a smile that lights up a room. She inspires me to be better.
I am thankful for Katy.

I have five kids. I'll bet you can guess what the next four gratitude posts will be.

Gratitude day 18
I am grateful for Morgan. I'm pretty sure I frustrate her but I have no doubt she loves me. She has always wanted to do things well or not at all. She is statuesque with an impeccable sense of style but I have no idea if she would agree with me.She is intelligent. She has kind eyes that draw you in. She has a way about her that is endearing. I love watching her interact with the people she loves.
I am thankful for Morgan

She really does find me impossible at times but whenever she can't figure something out, needs help of any kind or isn't feeling well she always come to me because she knows I've got her back every time.

Gratitude day 19
I am grateful for Kyle. He is clever. He can do anything he tries but sometimes getting him to try is difficult. He is shy but once you become his friend he is your friend forever. He has many talents but has a few particularly interesting talents. He always makes me feel safe & protected. He goes out of his way to make me giggle every day and I love a good giggle.
I am thankful for Kyle.

He has a spectacular way with words and can Tetris anything. He is a thinker and figures out the world in ways others do not. I am so lucky to call him son!

Gratitude day 20
I am grateful for Cody. My gentle giant. He is a calming influence in any situation. He does not like injustice or cruelty. His compassion and kindness is limitless. He remains focused at any task he undertakes. He always does his footwork so he is never stepping in totally blind. He is my very own tech department, any time I need help. He is a wonderful daddy and adores his little family.
I am thankful for Cody.

This guy was a calming influence since birth and I wouldn't trade him for the world.

Gratitude day 21
I am grateful for Hoss. He is a really great dad. The well being of his family comes first. As it should. He has always taken the role as defender and protector. Sometimes disguised as a tease but I know his intentions are always good. He always makes me laugh and I know he loves me!
I am thankful for Hoss.

With the best intentions he is a right fighter. I wish other people understood him the way I do and appreciated his efforts.

Gratitude day 22
I am grateful for modern medicine and healing. We are so lucky to live in a time of less evasive testing, medications, and surgeries that can save our lives. I am grateful for physicians, all positive energy and prayer that help heal as well. So call me a kook, I am okay with that label because I believe in all things that help heal.
I am thankful for modern medicine and healing.

I was diagnosed with an unexpected problem on a routine doctor visit. I am on medication now and frankly wish I could kick this thing today because it is no good. Gratefully I have good doctors and medication.

Gratitude day 23
I am grateful for Zackery. He is this amazing 5 year old boy with a joyful smile that makes me happy every time I see it. He calls just to say hi. He is very athletic, smart and adores his baby sister. We can play all day and never tire of each other. He love me and I love him! What a blessing.
I am thankful for Zackery.

I believe Zack is aware of his role as older brother and take it very seriously. He lets his little brother pounce on him and I give him credit for not taking him out. He dotes on his baby sister and it is the sweetest thing to watch. He is finding his own identity and I appreciate the ride.

Gratitude day 24
I am grateful for Jax. Who knew one human being could hold so much love? He is independent, a little shy and yet sometimes the star of the show. He will try anything his brother does. It reminds me that a middle kid is the one to watch out for because he will always try harder striving to be the best, the center. He is such a sweet guy.
I am thankful for Jax.

Jax is the rough one. I blame the middle kid thing but it may be more than that. But he is so charming and has a smile that will make you forget every other thing in the world. How could you not love that?

Gratitude day 25
I am grateful for Amanda. She is picture perfect. Seriously born to be in photos. Such a beauty. No really I have proof! She is a watcher and her brothers give her plenty to watch. She is a problem solver at one! Her gorgeous smile is kept hidden from most but comes out at just the right moments. I love this girl!
I am thankful for Amanda.

Beyond pretty this little girl knows she has the world at her fingertips. Not is a spoiled brat kind of way but in a "I got this" kind of way.

Gratitude day 26
I am grateful for Ronin. He is a puzzle I am willing to spend a lifetime figuring out. I can see how smart he is every time we are around each other.He likes to know how things work, a lot like his dad that way.  He is musical and funny. He lets me take a million and a half pictures, probably because mommy does too. He takes a minute to warm up but I know he loves me.
I am thankful for Ronin.    

He is so much like his parents, Ronin is a logical, watcher of of the world. He figures things out and can play to the audience. Such a talented kid!

Gratitude day 27
I am grateful for modern conveniences. You know the type like indoor plumbing, well running water for sure because I live in a moderate climate and could actually run to an outhouse. Never mind I love indoor toilets. But there are so many conveniences I use every day like a stove, I don't have to stoke, can easily turn the heat up or down, a shower I don't have to boil water to enjoy, a vacuum so I don't have to beat rugs and a washer and dryer. Imagine scrubbing them by hand and wringing them out! Or is the weather good enough to dry my clothes? There are more. I have at one point or another had to go without them and I will never take them for granted!
I am thankful for modern conveniences.

Recently I had to make a trip to the laundromat. It was a purposeful decision to wash a fairly large rug without stressing out my own washer. I took a large and smaller rug and brought them home to dry. when I pulled 'them' out one was missing. Worst fear the matching rug is missing. Luckily it was hiding in the van but it reminded me why I hate having to go elsewhere to wash items. Then watching an outdoor show on TV I was reminded again of why having indoor plumbing is just the best gift ever!

Gratitude day 28
I am grateful for all of the things I can do. I would list them but the list is long. It took me a long time to focus on this list and realize the importance of it. I can do so much. So what if I can't do all things, I am just not meant to do them.
I am thankful for all of the things I can do!

There are days it is easy to wallow in the things I can't do but I would really appreciate the things I can. I am going to go beyond and celebrate my list and make sure I leave nothing off.

Gratitude day 29
I am grateful for stars. I love the night sky. No, I don't know all of the constellations but that doesn't stop me from enjoying their beauty. For many years I have lived in rural areas where you could really clearly see them. I mean almost every night you could look up and see multitudes of stars. For the past five years I have lived near my childhood neighborhood in a not so rural area. I look up to the sky on a clear night and I can see some stars. Some nights not too many but I can see them. I love them. The magnitude of them, the beauty of them, the whimsy of them (Star Light Star Bright) all really sweep me to a place of peace.
I am thankful for stars.

Look up. Appreciate the beauty of it. Don't see it? Your loss!

Gratitude day 30
I am grateful for life's little speed bumps. I don't like speed bumps, especially the kind I have to cross in the car, but those are not the ones I'm talking about. I'm talking about the things that make you have to slow down a little to make it down the path. Slowing down, you can appreciate the things to come that you might not have seen had you rushed on by.
I am thankful for for life's little speed bumps.

I have had a ton. Some lasting longer than others and it took me a long time to learn to really appreciate that maybe God had different plans than I so I go at His pace and really learn to appreciate the ride.

November 2013 Quotes

Blog post #377 of 365

"You only live once. False: You live every day. You only die once." Channing

"Truth is eternal so it can never be old or new." Matt Walsh
http://themattwalshblog.com/2013/11/09/abstinence-is-unrealistic-and-old-fashioned/

"Truth never grows old, and if you believe in it and try to live by it, you will be in some ways - the only ways that matter - the youngest, freshest, most energetic rebel on the block!" More Matt

"Casual sex is a lie... that rests on lies and breeds lies and turns people into liars." More Matt

"When following a dream one may falter but the only way to fail is to give up." Dracula

"Turbulance so strong I was tossed about like a hoodrat at a block party." Anonymous

"Parents who are afraid to put their foot down usually have kids who step on their toes." Ramona G

"Someday I will find the right words and they will be simple." Mozz

"You don't marry to make yourself happy you marry to make someone else happy." Seth's dad

"Selfishness demands, 'Whats in it for me?' While love asks, 'What can I give?'" Seth

"Remember that sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck." Richard

"The quality of your life may be determined by what you are willing to do with the space between who you are and who you want to be!" Kerry

"Nothing you have ever been through is wasted." Debi

"One day someone will hug you so tight all of your broken pieces will stick back together." Karen D

"The only way of discovering the limits of the possible is to venture a little way past them into the impossible." A Clarke via Cortney

"You can't have happiness without hope." Bones

"Now that the world has the facilities to transmitting intelligence rapidly it is said they are having difficulty finding enough to transmit." Unknown Author via Mitch J

"Someday everything will make perfect sense. So, for now, laugh at the confusion, smile through the tears, and keep reminding yourself that everything happens for a reason." Stephanie L

"If your actions do not prove the truth of your words, then your words are nothing more than lies! Just saying!!" Kerry H

"My track record for getting through bad days so far is 100%, and I think that is pretty good." Me

"You are free to choose but you are not free from the consequences of your choices." Joyce

"If you live off the compliments of others you will die by their criticism." Jessica L

"Forgiveness is about the act not the individual." Me

"Never look down on anybody, unless you're helping them up" Stephanie P

"Sometimes the best thing to say is nothing" Kid President

"It's okay to disagree but it isn't okay to be mean." KP

"If you're not thinking of something nice to say you aren't thinking hard enough." KP

"If you have the power to make someone happy, do it. We need more of that in the world today." Sara K

"It's my story and it matters!" Melanie's nephew

"It matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be." Albus D

"My world really is made up of many little moments." Me

"When you change the way you look at things the things you look at change." Jimbo

"I am human therefore I make mistakes." Leanna Kay

"...who would hunt me down like a coyote on a kangaroo rat in Mojave if I mentioned her name." Karenism

"It is easier to learn from a mistake if you own it. You can't learn anything from denial." Me

"Simply be the qualities you seek in others." Kerry

"Life is full of nos, but one yes can change everything." Me

"I see/hear a lot or talk/discussion about equal rights, but never any talk about the equal responsibility that most assuredly accompanies that right. If you are going to be honest, your rights will NEVER be equal if you do not bear the responsibility. Interestingly how the RIGHTS are either granted by God or in some cases granted/protected by government, but the whole RESPONSIBILITY part seems to be voluntary." Spencer H

"Thanksgiving is an annual reminder that all human beings walk the same road, and that they need to rely on God. It is a reminder that the nation's heritage draws it's strength from gratitude and humility, not selfishness and greed." Deseret News

"Whereas it is the duty of all nations to acknowledge the providence of Almighty God, to obey His will, to be grateful for His benefits, and humbly to implore His protection and favor. George Washington

"Be careful what you say and do, it isn't alwyas just about you. Cary H

"May we remember the goodness in our lives, care about what matters, and work to increase the kindness and tolerance in the world." Gary W

"If a man has to constantly say he is king, he is clearly not ruling anything."  Aj Grier

"I believe that opportunity looks a lot like hard work." Ashton K 2014 Teen Choice Awards

"The sexiest thing in the entire world is being smart" Ashton K

"Build a life, don't live one, build one." Ashton K

"...working hard and being thoughtful and generous and smart - it's a path to a better life." Ashton K

"There's an entitlement that is starting to emerge that I think is unhealthy for people and unhealthy for our country." Ashton K

"Perhaps it is really as easy as removing from our eyes the scales of judgement and indifference so we can see once again with the pure and perfect vision of a child." Tara Starling https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10202886311219181&set=a.1900812360398.2117368.1244363054&type=1&theater

Exerpt from Jimmy Stewart's A Dog Named Beau
"He would wake up at night
and he would have this fear
Of the dark, of life and lots of things,
And he'd be glad to have me near

And now he's dead.
And there are nights when I think I feel him
Climb up on our bed and lie between us,
And I would pat his head.
And there are nights when I think I feel his stare
And I reach out my hand to stroke his hair,
But he isn't there.

Oh how I wish that wasn't so,
I'll always love a dog named Beau."

Sigh

Blog post #376 of 365

One more day of medication every 4.8 to 5 hours. I want an eight hour night of sleep. Something tells me that isn't going to happen. Sigh...

Traffic

Blog post #374 of 365

I figured with the gratitude posts going on (next installment in two days) and my personal family celebration on hold I would just post what is on my mind. So here goes.

Most traffic can be avoided. Ge earlier or schedule between traffic hours.

Well two days ago I found  out how stupid traffic really is. They have a new toll/carpool lane. Long story short you can pop in for a fee or you can haul around two friends and drive in a special lane all to yourself. Okay I guess that is a way to avoid traffic to a certain extent but I'd have a hard trying to entice people to ride with me into LA.

Back to stupid traffic. That dumb carpool lane have very few openings and so people who live between them are not likely to pay a toll to avoid a little stretch of traffic filling up the remaining lanes. Because it only opens up rarely when it does those drivers trying to get on or off force their way into an already overstuffed freeway. When I was approaching the break in the lane traffic slowed down more than 30 miles per hour. I checked! It was 33 to be exact!

I have known for years that people will slow down to look at an accident which slows the next driver and the next. People love gore. They watch boxing, hockey and car races for similar reasons. Two days ago I discovered it doesn't even have to be a wreck. They see the lights and slow to look. Why? There is no blood or carnage... Again we slowed 30 miles per hour. We passed the pulled over driver and instantly the speeds went up 30 miles or more. There were some definitely some speeders with me.

Traffic, I'm not a fan.

Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom, Until Your Ears Bleed

Blog post #373 of 365

Really mom just give him a moment. The longer you don't give him a moment the more moments he tries to demand! When I hear kids doing the mom, mom, mom thing I want to pick up their kid and give them an hour of undivided, loving attention but then I fear that will just make it worse!

Then there is the kid who wants his way. Wants his way no matter what! Will ask a million and a half times if that is what it takes to get it or get discouraged. I never liked the idea of discouraging kids.

I was watching a lawyer show ans was intrigued by the objection, asked and answered. Meaning the lawyer is going from a different angle or using semantics to ask the question twice. I had a son like that. I always thought he would be a good lawyer because he could ask the same question ten different ways. I always responded with already answered. He knew this meant I was aware of his tactics and he knew the answer.

When I was preparing to write this. (Yes I do prepare. Research stuff now and again.) I looked up asked and answered to make sure I knew what the lawyers were objecting to. I was right by the way.) I came across a parenting site www.positiveparentingsolutions.com  it used a similar approach that I did 23 years ago. Mine when like this.

After he would ask a second time I would say, "I have heard this question. then restate his original question so he positively knew I was listening to his request."
I would then ask him if I had answered that question.
He usually try to tell me it was somehow different to which I would say, "Already answered." He would stop in his tracks every time. He might try again many hours or a day or two later but all I needed to say was already answered.

The parenting site was a little more in depth. It said the parent should ask the child if her or she looked like the kind of person who would change his or her mind if they asked over and over again? My kids were smarter than that. They would say maybe I'll just have to keep trying to find out. I would never have allowed that! However I do like asked and answered over my already answered because it acknowledges the child's participation in the process.

What I'm getting at is please stop your kids from nagging you. Develop a routine for the second time they ask the question. Validate that they asked but please do not become the parent who ignores their child. It drives the rest of us bonkers!!!

Irrational and Real Fear

Blog post #373 of 365

I know fear. I grew up in a house filled with constant fear. (Abusive parent, explanation for another day maybe.)

True fear is the is to worry about something you expect to happen. Then there is the fear of something that might happen. Big difference but sometimes you have no idea if or when something bad might happen. Real fear is knowing nothing much sets him off and at any time he could go in a rage. That is real fear. No if, just when. No why, just because.

Irrational fear is real. I've had that too. Like when my daughter who was born with a heart defect. They told me if she made it to her second birthday she would likely make it to adulthood. It felt like I was holding my breath for two years. That was real fear. But the irrational part came in when I decided to delay getting my tubes tied because I knew in my heart if I did my daughter would surly die. That isn't rational. But I convinced myself it was true. Irrational fear is when I had an accident in the grocery store and for a year could not go up and down the isle. I would break our it a cold sweat, couldn't catch my breath and sometimes stood paralyzed in one spot for several minutes at a time completely unable to move.

Now I have a real reason to have real fear.

Food allergies make eating outside my home difficult. I always have to ask how stuff is prepared and in what. What is in it and more. Pot lucks at church are a nightmare, dinner at a friends is usually a little easier because I tell them ahead of time what I have allergies to. But then there is the I just don't care about your allergies people who make whatever and then get mad when I can't eat.

I have also developed allergies to smells. Oil, grass, flowers, perfumes, potpourri, air fresheners, creams, lotions, soaps, hair sprays, cologne, topical medications and more. I take tons of medications. I don't go where I'll find lots of people and I wear a mask when it gets bad.

Here is where the irrational part comes in. I am getting to the point where I dread leaving home. I avoid public restrooms because they nearly always have an air freshener. Lord help me but I feel like a pariah.

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I've Been Off A Little This Week

Blog post # 372 of 365

I started and even completed several blog posts over the last seven days. Many of which were scheduled to post. But I never actually posted them until tonight. Some I reworked. Some I finished today. This one was started and finished tonight.

I was preparing for a huge crowd Saturday and we know how that all turned out. Also this every five hour thing with medication that makes me feel tired but doesn't help me sleep hasn't helped much. No excuse is a good one I guess.

To the few who read every post or nearly every post thank you for your patience and I apologize for they delay. I shall try harder.

Contagious?

Blog post #371 of 365

How do you know when you are no longer contagious? From what the doctor said I need to wash my hands often and not let anyone touch my head.

Really not much information. But then again I was in a hurry to go to the eye specialist, to wait five hours...

So I looked it up. It said what the doctor said but also said to cover the affected area. So I have had on a bandanna or hat and staying away from the immune suppressed or old folk. Mom had it so she can't get it from me, yay! It says once the spots scab over (like chicken pox) I would be less or no longer contagious depending on which site you believe. But they all said the same medication was needed which I am taking and to finish it. One says to be "cautious" until the medication is finished.

I don't have scabs. I have dry patches. I have areas that burn still but it says that could last for months and in some cases never go away. Ugh!

But how contagious am I? Or am I at all...

I Don't Want To Talk About It

Blog post #370 of 365

I don't want to talk about it! You read it all yesterday. Who wants to make turkey without family or friends over to eat it with?

Okay the food was good but it was pretty lonely!

A Wrench In The Plans

Blog post #369 of 365

Thursday was a bust! And tomorrow will be worse!!!

Saturday we were having our usual family tradition of early Thanksgiving. BUT NOT THIS YEAR!!!

Yesterday I went for a routine doctor visit. However I had a few complaints and got diagnosed with Shingles. Really, isn't that what old people get? I know people it their twenties who have gotten it but I was not ready for a contagious diagnosis two days before the big family gathering. No really usually more than thirty people if everyone shows up!

After the regularly scheduled appointment I was sent to an eye doctor. A specialist since the shingles infection seemed to begin in my eye. It took 6 hours. Not joking. When I got home I made dinner. Then my contact began to feel irritated more than it did when I returned it to my eye after the dilation and three other drops they put in. I couldn't get a grip on it. No really it was not coming out. Then I started rubbing my eye. It was irritated. When then bunched up the contact and became stuck under the lid. I couldn't get it out. My eye was more swollen and several more OTC eye drops later my eye hurt like crazy. As soon as my son got home it was off to the ER. Like my day wasn't bad enough already.

So every 4.8 hours I take shingles medication and 3 times a day I put in antibiotic eye drops. Ugh.

Today I texted everyone with apologies for the late cancellation. They all took it very nicely.

Gramie Ham Recipe

Blog post #368 of 365

With the holidays coming up I a giving up a family tradition. Although I might have given this one up sometime earlier.
My mom, before she became a diabetic, made a ham every Easter and sometimes for Thanksgiving. She made it by taste and frankly should never do that again because it could bring on a diabetic coma. After much trial and error I have a decent replica of Gramie ham. It is a tangy sweet ham.

What you'll need:
Baking dish with a lid or use foil, measuring cup, spoon
pre-sliced ham
1/2 cup frozen orange juice concentrate thawed
1/2 honey
1/2 spicy brown mustard
about 1 liter ginger ale (not diet)

What you'll do:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees
Mix honey, oj, and mustard in a small bowl until well blended. In a baking dish (I use and 9X9 but it depends on how much ham you are making, more ham will require more mixture mentioned prior) layer your ham spooning a little of the mustard/oj/honey mixture between each layer. Pour any remaining mixture over the top. Pour ginger ale over the prepared ham. (size of the pan, amount of ham will all be a factor in how much ginger ale you will use. Cover your baking dish with foil or a lid. Put it in the oven and bake covered for an hour. Serve hot.

We always had this with a big feast usually with some other meats involved. However my son loved this dish. I usually serve it with rice and vegetables on the side.

Early Childhood Education

Blog post #367 of 365

The debate lives on.

People have debated education as long as people have been educated. At first it was only for the people who worked for the rich. Then only for the rich themselves. Then for boys and privileged girls. Eventually everyone got a chance to go to school.You'd probably be surprised just how recent (around the late 1880's in most places) that new fangled idea came about but I for one am glad it did.

In the early days of education the wee ones were taught at home. Formal education for young kids didn't begin until kids were ready. Read able to sit for 4 to 6 hours in a chair. So usually after potty training and well into language development and social skills. Sometimes way into social skills. Pre-formal education skills were learned in the home, at church  and in the community. Yes, back then most towns had a church or more that every 'civilized' person attended.

The question most recently debated is: Which is better for early childhood education, play or academics?

As a child of the 60's my early childhood education (Kindergarten) consisted of a bunch of play where we learned to get along with others, follow directions. We had light academics where we learned to identify some shapes, colors, numbers, the alphabet. We also learned about important people like firemen & policemen and how to identify our names. (I do not remember being read to but we sang songs.) We ate a snack, usually a graham cracker and white milk (not sweetened 'strawberry' or chocolate milk for us) and had a good long nap in that half day of school.

I went to school to become an educator. While in school I spent a year working the the early childhood education department. Part of that year I help work on the department's accreditation application. It was interesting. I remember they had a really broad approach to teaching early childhood educators. Sadly most States and districts adopt one idea of how early childhood education should be offered. It is still a half a day in most cases but now with way more academics and a lot less play. Oh and don't get me wrong I am glad 2/3 of their time isn't spent napping. I hear some still have a rest time. Really nearly fifty years later and you spend a big chuck of teaching time taking a rest?

I believe the earlier child is exposed to education the better. For many Mom and dad should be the first teachers. But this is usually not the case either. Parents work and parents don't always know to work with their kids at all. Even something as simple as identifying body parts. Who doesn't play where's your (fill in a body part) with their kids? Or helping them identify colors and shapes when they are one, two and three.

To be honest a few kids are ready to read and write at two and three. They are ready to do simple math and write their names while others aren't ready until they are four or five. Formal school at 3 sure but be realistic a 3 hour day at 3 years old and work up to a 5 hour day for a 5 year old. Oh wait we can't do that because no district is willing to pay a kindergarten teacher for preparation time no matter how important that might be and no union is going to 'settle' for a part time kindergarten teacher contract. So the teacher spits the day with am and pm kids with their own set of challenges.

In the first year or two (if you start at 3) lots of play and a little academics thrown into the play. By the time kids are in Kindergarten they should be really ready to write letters, draw shapes, identify colors, do simple addition and subtraction (single digit for sure) and identify sight words. Learning should be a balance of play and sitting in circle time or at their desks. Lots of reading from the first day of school until they begin reading to you!

The problem you say is where is the money for early childhood education. Well to be honest it is spent on special programs for the kids who are not doing as well all though elementary school and beyond. You want kids to do their best, be their best, work smarter not harder well then give the a chance! Rant over.