The I Really Hate the 'F' Word

Blog post #51 of 365

Okay I am not a fan of the 'F' word. You know the actual word 'F U C K' specifically. It is a crude word for an act that is very natural and wonderful. Oh there are some who say love making and fucking are not the same thing but if there is no love there shouldn't be an intimate act. You can disagree if you want. You have that right.

Actually this post isn't about that word.  This post is about the 'F' word that has haunted me for more than 37 years, fibromyalgia. I have had pain for as long as I can remember. It got really bad when I hit puberty. After a few years of doctors tossing back and forth ideas they suggested I go get tested and the university (USC) medical center. They did a slew of tests and the diagnosis was fibromyalgia. I made the doctor write it down. As he wrote he said. "I hope I'm wrong." You see there is no real definitive tests that can say you absolutely have it or you absolutely don't. They didn't have any real literature on it. A pamphlet with symptoms and not much else. My symptoms fell right into line with all of the symptoms in the pamphlet. Pain, muscles aches, fatigue, and tender points on my back, chest, hips and legs. It didn't give me any hope so I ignored the diagnosis. I prayed he was wrong and that the symptoms would subside. They never did.

This was in the 70's no internet and really not much in the library. There was a little blurb in about three books. That was all I found. By the late 80's early 90's it seemed to be a label for anyone with unexplained pain. Books came out on the subject but most of them were kind of general and not very informative. Some were a more autobiographical, "I have fibromyalgia" kind of book. With so many people having been probably misdiagnosed I feel like there is a lot of bad information out there.

I would never say fibromyalgia isn't real because I have it! I am saying in some cases fibromyalgia has become an excuse for people to be lazy and cranky. I've had it all of these years and I have learned to deal with it. Medications didn't come out until recently and I can tell you they help. Keeping active helps. It is hard some days but it is worth the effort. If you let it shut you down it gets worse and it is harder to pull back up. So on bad days I stretch and walk some. Every little bit helps.

It has many causes and once you get it you never get rid of it. So why not live with it. Live through it and do what you can to keep it at bay. By taking medication, eating right and moving.